Leo Tolstoy, a Russian writer, said, “If you want to be happy, be.” In life, it’s a struggle to stay happy with all the commotion like Tolstoy suggests. Below, I have eight points in leading a depressing, stress-filled, and drama-crammed life. Although this is not a definitive list, I’ve found that any of these points can make your life more miserable.
1. Frown. According to 15 Fascinating Facts About Smiling at http://www.pickthebrain.com, smiling can help improve your mood, boost your immune system, and relieve stress. Who needs that? Just frown and show the world exactly how you feel about it each day. You’ll spread so much joy, just as IRS tax auditors do.
2. Get inadequate sleep. More specifically, get less sleep that your body needs to function well. Stay up late playing your favorite game or watching your favorite episode of Grey’s Anatomy till 4 a.m. Just get four hours of sleep a night so you’ll wake up feeling exhausted and ready to phase-out during all five of your classes. If you have trouble falling asleep, consume fatty foods, engage in activities that are chaotic, and do not relax. For restless dreams, read stressful books such as a Social Psychology textbook or watch Captain Phillips.
3. Dehydrate Yourself. It is said that one must drink at least eight 8-ounce glasses of water per day. Who has time for that? It takes time to constantly fill up your water bottle, measure your intake, and go to the bathroom multiple times during the day. Skip that drink so your day will be consumed by migraines, sicknesses, exhaustion, and higher stress levels.
4. Eat Unhealthy. Simple–eat foods that make you feel as sick as you feel in an unstable relationship. You only live once so help yourself to four of your favorite meatball hot pockets in the frozen food section at Broulim’s or a large bag of Starburst Jelly Beans from last Easter that you can consume in one sitting. You will have a sugar rush that will help you be energetic for ten minutes before crashing, even more wiped-out than before.
5. Stay in friendships, relationships, or situations that bring drama into your life. You may be able to stress yourself out just fine, but you’ll never achieve true anxiety nirvana until you constantly associate with people that are overly dramatic. Become deeper friends with that roommate who is always venting about their dating problems and gets you involved. Grab a bowl of popcorn and be ready to be the constant sounding board when your Family Home Evening sister has her seventh meltdown this week. Drop whatever you’re doing to jump into drama. Pay attention to how those people make you feel inside. If they inspire you take Excedrin every day, they’re keepers!
6. Be drama. Can you work yourself up even more over an issue? Bet you can. Constantly complain and be pessimistic. Make a mountain of that molehill. Make lemons out of lemonade. Everyone loves misery.
7. Dwell on how bad your life is. Despite that even on your very worst days, there is always someone else having a tougher time, just ignore all that. Think of you. Look at online news and you’ll find plenty of people who can’t even relate to your bad day. Forget that a Malaysian plane disappeared three weeks ago and ripped apart hundreds of lives. Your day is definitely worse than that.
8. Be disorganized. It’s hard to feel down when you are organized. Don’t bother carrying around a planner or writing down notes of assignments and to do tasks. Just let people remind you of what assignments you have and you can quickly do your best work eight minutes before class.
Though this list may not be complete, at least one idea here can likely increase your blood pressure. Master it and select another. Eventually, you too can burn out! The only way to be stressed is to be. Leo Tolstoy would be so proud.